wtf [ 2006-06-13, 11:47 p.m. ]

Dear Diary,

I have just embarrassed myself. Again. I can only imagine how much I normally embarrass myself. I was talking to Michael on the phone and we were just talking about life in general and he asked me how last week went, and then I just went on this big tirade about Alphie. Well at one point Michael just said he had to go, but I realized that I rarely get to talk to Michael on the phone, and I just wasted too much precious time on one of our few phone conversations complaining AGAIN.

I know, all I do is complain. I can't help it. I just start to talk about Alphie in answer to a few simple questions and then it seems I cannot stop the flowing of bitchy complaininess that flows from my mouth. I used to be that way about Frank too.

Well I can't help it. I must have so much anger in me and it just leaks out. I don't know what to do. My life seems so entwined with all these people that piss me off. And just when I think I am done with them, they either reappear, and come back, or seem to change, and I get all hopeful and then disappointed and more ANGRY!! I know it's my own fault but how can I get to a place where I can either just let go, or keep it to myself?

What the fuck.

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