Dear Diary,

I miss my lover. So bad. I miss his body, the way his skin smells. I miss how the left side of his mouth goes up in a smirk before he smiles. I miss how he loved to spoon me, we would always cuddle when we slept. I miss how sometimes we would wake up, and he would either kiss me on the lips or on the back of my neck while still half asleep.

I miss that he would open the car door for me, and loved to take me out to dinner. I miss that we would make love for hours before going out to breakfast. I miss that "I'm tired and ready to go to bed," really meant, "I'm getting a little tired, so I'm ready to go to bed and make love before we fall asleep."

I miss how he would hold my hand when we walked down the street. I miss how he loved to eat whatever I cooked, and how appreciated I felt. I miss that he would play the piano for me sometimes while he was waiting for me to come out of the bathroom.

I miss how he would come over and read magazines in my living room. I miss how he would always be supportive of me in my work. I miss what a good listener he is, and would want to hear all the details.

I miss going to the grocery store with him- the most mundane tasks that we could turn into fun. I miss hearing about his day and the challenges he overcame at school. I miss how masculine he can be in bed.

I just miss him, and I don't understand why I am in this place. Is there any way to make this any easier? It doesn't seem fair, that love is not enough.

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