Dear Diary,

I wish I had something interesting and exciting to say, but really it's just the same old stuff. I did sleep better than I have in several days, so that's some good news. But I also still have a weird dry cough. I hardly ever get sick, maybe only once a year, so I don't adapt well to things like weird dry coughs. Just so you know.

I haven't done much today but sleep, and lounge around in pajamas. As usual procrastinating about the many things I have to do for work. I think it's just a matter of doing a little something every once in a while, rather than feeling overwhelmed about ALL the things that need to be done.

I am aware I am trying to protect myself from being hurt, but that is an impossible thing. I am already hurting, but burying everything underneath. Hoping I can find some way or some escape to avoid feeling what I eventually will have to feel full force if I want to be free. The trick is detangling the past from the present so I know what's real. I tend to think it's about the current situation, but more than likely it's old hurt just trying to stay buried.

That's that. I'm going to see Russell today, and I look forward to hanging out with him. I hope to get more sleep, and eat something delicious. Next week I will really be back to work.

Really.

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