Dear Diary,

Hello again. Here I sit after a long day... I don't even know what I did today. I did some yoga, and cried practically the whole time. Holy feelings all over the place! I don't know why, but they are just coming out everywhere. I'm okay with that... let's get rid of 'em! We don't need them anymore! I'm ready to clear all anger and sadness and just feel good! Yes I am... Somehow I wasted time for hours and hours until it was time to go to a meeting...

I got dressed and even though I looked pretty tired today, I feel like overall I am looking good these days. I like having a slimmer stomach.

And then in the meeting, guess what? I actually got mad! One of my colleagues brought along his assistant, and this guy was really tense. He acted like all my proposals were personal affronts to his character. Finally, I just found myself saying, "Can I just say something?!" and I let if all out- how I felt his behavior was inappropriate, and his comments to me were unprofessional.

I surprised myself. It was obvious I was angry, but I didn't care- normally I would feel so self conscious and humiliated about showing those feelings. But I have been doing so much anger release, that when he snapped at me I could almost FEEL myself swallowing it. And I decided I just could not, WOULD NOT, do that anymore. I've been doing that my whole life! No way, Jose. WOW. I never did this before!

Hmm. So I'm quite impressed with myself. Afterward I met with Red for dinner, and it was really nice. I ordered everything I wanted, and for some reason my food came a long time before Red's and my dinner was pretty much finished before his even got to the table. Regardless I shared some of my food with him and we had a nice time. He even paid!

Maybe... I think... I AM GETTING BETTER!!! This is a good sign, don't you think?

I'd like to think so.

Love,
Duck

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