Dear Diary,

Three ayem is coughing time, just in case you were wondering.

And now I have really screwed up my sleeping schedule! I woke up a bunch but could not. Get out of bed!!! Having a ton of dreams too.

I still can't hear a thing. It's annoying and a little frightening. Did I mention that last night I almost got hit by a car? I was crossing as I should but apparently a minivan was trying to make the light (actually at that point running the light, no doubt) and beeped it's horn at me and literally, I did not see the thing coming or hear it until the horn. Missed me by about two inches, and I'm not exaggerating. My life could have been completely different today, that's for sure. But maybe I have a guardian angel.

Thanks for the comments everyone. Good to know I'm not as evil as I think I am!

Swing texted me today, "Thanks for your sweet follow-up VM. I look forward to our next date. When are you back in town?"

Oh. Disappointment. Dude, a text message? That's the best you can do? And so late, too. Hmm. Not impressed.

I would be so bored if I didn't have all these judgments to make.

Elliot wants to know what I'm doing Christmas day- is he gonna invite me to spend time with him and his ex-girlfriend? They live together still and he says she's "like family". I think more "like mommy" as she is significantly older than him and hasn't kicked him out yet.... like, when IS he planning on getting out of there? Don't get me wrong, I don't mind her at all- I have met her, she seems very independent (a bonus of being older) and cool and I DON'T believe that there is anything going on there, sexually or emotionally that's like a grown-up relationship... but I do wonder what kind of man in his thirties his dragging his ass about getting his own place. I mean really. How does he expect to have a girlfriend, much less a monogamous one, when there's nowhere to hang out? Maybe that's one of my "points" that makes me so attractive- he's always saying he can't wait to come here again. I have my own apartment and to him that's probably a big part of my dowry!

Oh Duck, you judgy, grumpy, shit on a stick girl. You are so high and mighty today, aren't you?! So perfect.

Okay I'm not. I'm just friggin' cranky. I can't hear anything! I can't breathe! My throat hurts! I want to be better!!

Let's see, what else can I complain about? Um, that? No, did that.. hmm... well, I might be done.

But don't worry, I'll be back!

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