Dear Diary,

Smitten called me this morning, but I was asleep, dreaming again.

When I got up I called him back, and we talked for about a half an hour. He sounds the same as ever, only mentioning "things have been weird and emotional". I didn't tell him that I sent a card- I'll just let it be a surprise.

Some conversation about work (he is busy and miserable and can't wait to get the hell out of where he is and move here), and lots of sexual innuendo, he also said he missed me, which is sweet. So I admitted I missed him too. And more sexual innuendo. Sometimes it makes me nervous, because well, it makes me think he might be trying to use me just for sex. But I suppose if that was true, he would have made the moves on me already, wouldn't say the sweet things he does, and wouldn't bother to keep in touch with me. Most likely he would have tried to sleep with me the first night we went out. He definitely would have kissed me, anyway. Don't you think?

It's weird because I don't have casual sex with guys anyway... but I would think that at least some kissing would be happening. I guess it makes no sense to ruminate on it while Smitten is away. I guess, I hope, I'll just get kissed when he is back.

Ah, boring to you, maybe, but important to me- it's been a while since I've felt physical or emotional closeness with anyone!

Now, okay, I am going to spend some time on taxes. Right now!

[previous] [next]