two vulnerable emails [ 2010-05-20, 11:10 a.m. ]

Dear Diary,

Last night I wrote two vulnerable emails: one to the lady who changed a product and expected me to purchase it without sampling, and another to the woman who doesn't LISTEN. I was very honest in that I admitted my own mistakes and was open to a different communication.

I got a message back from the first lady, and I feel like she just wants to punish me... She doesn't understand my "hard stance" and why I felt "backed into a corner." I had explained why- they raised the price on me twice and changed the formula once, only telling me at the very last minute. It's bad business. It's lame because originally she said she was doing what I asked for but when I insisted I hadn't asked for it, she then changed her story to "I was using my intuition." Gee, I feel sorry for her husband- imagine living with someone who doesn't take any responsibility for their actions. Fun! She now
claims she is "skittish" about working with me
again and even though I'm pissed, really in the
end why would it matter? Do I really want to work with anybody who doesn't take responsibility for themselves? There will just be more problems down the road.

I called David this morning on the way to work to vent about the other girl- I know he has history with her of some sort, though I'm not sure what it is. By the time I explained my story to him though he had to start work, so he had to go and I will have to hear about his experience at another time.

Maybe it's all a reflection for me of how much I don't want to hear the truth about Shelby. I mean, I know that everything Serena says makes sense. I have never been married before but I can imagine. And there are people who have open marriages but I'm not really sure what shape this one takes. Is it really open or was this
just Shelby's free pass because they weren't living together? It probably doesn't even matter and I should just get out while everything is on a good note. Kind of like the Seinfeld show ending when it's still good. Get out before negative feelings start stirring around or some mess happens or communication or honesty start to decline.

That seems wise and I'm still afraid to have that void, that empty space in my life. Even though rationally I know something always happens, it's my body that feels terrified.

But yes, I know it's for the best... it can't really go anywhere. And I believe Shelby about being friends... I think I do. Okay I don't completely. That is what makes me afraid. Really afraid. Probably should bring that up when I talk to him.

Gah.

[previous] [next]

Photobucket
S DUCKIE
archives ~ profile ~
~ email ~ gbook ~ notes ~
~ host ~ image ~ design ~