Dear Diary,

Yesterday I realized I get so stressed over nothing. I get stressed because my house isn't clean, and I feel overwhelmed even when the things I have to do aren't really that hard. Like now: I am somehow stressed due to my cluttered house, the fact that I have to go to Don's wedding (which is at midnight) and the fact that I am leaving in two weeks. When in actuality there is a lot I can do between now and then.

So yesterday I realized it really doesn't behoove me to be so upset- I can leave the house a wreck, what is the difference, really? And I will get things done. Even if the majority of my client meetings do not pan out, I will still have enough money from my pt job and other work to manage going to my seminar mid-July. So I just need to relax.

Relax, Duckie!

I really have some hesitations about W and basically it is at the bottom of my list to meet with him. So probably intuitively I know already that he is bad news. Back in the day I would have been jumping at the chance to spend some time with him; but I have a sneaking suspicion that his overall way of operating has not changed. He is probably just as slick as ever...

Beanie reminded me that there are summer fairs going on these days and I think there is one near here so I am going to go check it out... that will be good to get out of the house.

I am feeling a little bit down I don't know why. Delia called me this morning and we talked a bit, she has a lot of bad things to say about her SIL, who is older but doesn't really do well with making money and is always struggling. That made me wonder if sometimes she and Bud sit around and talk about their little sisters being losers and unable to take care of themselves. I told Delia exactly how much debt I had and now I'm wondering if that was a mistake. I don't know for sure if she is saying bad things about me, but she judges everybody else so why not me?

On the verge of depression, and not sure why! Probably need to go outside.

Love,
Duck

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