Dear Diary,

Yesterday Tamara and I lay in the sun. It was wonderful and relaxing. All we needed was the little umbrellas for our drinks.

Tamara helped me reconfigure my profile for the online dating site. She thought with a few changes and a different photo, I should get a date any minute. T goes on dates every weekend and is always meeting guys online. I don't get it, since all I seem to meet are freaky losers who talk about their sensitive nipples or just getting out of rehab over eggs benedict. But what is left for me to do?

I am really getting aggravated because I want a boyfriend. There is no reason for me to be sitting home alone every night. I realized this was a problem when I got all excited about finally remembering to buy some bathroom cleaner so I could clean my tub, so I could take a bath. How sad. Sometimes during the day I just can't wait to get back home so I can lie in bed and watch TV- alone.

You know you are in trouble when you start thinking of the cast of That 70's Show as your friends that you can't wait to see...

I've never had such an addiction to television, but I think I'm now officially addicted. And I've stopped connecting so deeply with people and now just becoming a recluse. I felt pretty envious of Tamara yesterday as she was talking about all her dates. I have a pretty rich social life of friends when I think about it, but I am really ready for somebody who wants to take me out to dinner, or kiss me, or cuddle and watch a movie, something like that.

Today has been a very productive day. I did a ton of laundry- I was so out of laundry, I had no towels, or dishtowels, or anything resembling a towel left. Now I'm going to vacuum and do the dishes, then I will go fishing online.

At the very least, like I always say, I will have some interesting dating stories to tell...

Love,
Duck

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