Dear Diary,

Up early today, as usual. Didn't do anything at all yesterday, besides watch a movie and eat a very small dinner. I have no appetite, so I've noticed since I've returned from EVG that I never finish the food on my plate.

M never called yesterday, not a peep. That made me a little sad. All kinds of thoughts, ranging from maybe he was feeling trapped by talking to me the last couple of days, to maybe he is having a hard time and needs more space. That would be okay, I guess.

I just want to feel okay with myself, which is my big struggle. But I am trying. Trying to see the value in myself. It's tough when the external message seems to be that nobody wants to be with me. But it could be that I have been carrying that thought inside and I've just been manifesting it outside.

I also wish I felt better physically. Really there is nothing to do with that but wait it out, as it usually takes a couple of days. But it can be frustrating.

Well, maybe I'll write later.

Love,
Duck

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