Dear Diary,

Stacey and her kid arrived last night, Stacey wanted to treat me to dinner, but of course with a four-year-old, once he is done eating he starts throwing a fit and (fake) crying and we have to leave because we are ruining everybody's evening out.

This morning the kid was sitting on me at 7am. I was sooo frickin' tired but put on my best cheerful self- after all Stacey has been through enough and doesn't need my attitude.

We took a walk and then packed up for our long drive. Talked, but not much about Stacey's grief... more just general gossip and dealing with the kid. We finally pulled in and were greeted by Kelly, who accompanied us to Stacey's parents' house. On the way there Stacey asked Kelly if she had been to the ________ bar recently. Kelly said no, why? Stacey informed her that Stacey's mom had seen Kelly's boyfriend walking in the parking lot of said bar with a girl- a girl, apparently, that was not Kelly. I was sitting in the front seat with Kelly at this time and watched Kelly's hands tighten on the steering wheel and her foot press harder on the accelerator
while Stacey was telling her this... "Uh, perhaps you shouldn't tell her this when she is driving..." I said.

Turns out that Kelly had suspected because there were already signs: 1) Kelly & bf have not slept in the same bed for three weeks because of an old argument that she is ready to move on from but he will not and insists that he needs time to "think about" their relationship; 2) Kelly found cologne in the house and later hidden in bf's car, and he doesn't usually wear cologne; 3) she also found a condom in his car that he insists SHE put there a million years ago, but they haven't used condoms in ages and she thinks the expiry date is too recent to have anything to do with her.

Really it seems all the signs are pointing in one direction, don't you think?

Hmm. So we left Stacey with her grieving parents, Kelly enraged and ready to go home and kick her bf's ass... and me at my folks' having a chicken dinner. Later in the evening I went for a walk with my mom, and watched mindless television.

Emails from Smitten today included another group email poetic tribute to his friend that died in a car accident last week. I have already offered my condolences on that one, and do not feel like exposing myself more- mainly, reaching out to him and being ignored. Just can't handle it. I miss him somehow, but since we were never able to connect that deeply, it doesn't make sense to miss him that much.

Seems like I am always missing somebody, and
very rarely are they worth my time.

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