Okay Diary, so tell me if this is... a little bit sick.

Is it sick that whilst at Gia and Thomas's, I noticed the new invitation for Shelby's wedding, and secretly read it? And from that invitation, got their wedding website and I went and visited that today? And I also looked at their registry?

And not in a totally painful way, either. It's nice to see Shelby happy, okay. And there is a small, weird part of me that gets... I dunno if it's jealous... it just feels like the little kid part of me that wants to be part of EVERYTHING in his life, and doesn't want to be left out EVER. That's how I know it's a little kid kind of thinking... because grownups have to do stuff on our own sometimes. Lots of times.

But. Anyway. I am doing okay. Just that slight thing, and no crying or super duper downward spirals. But still teetering on a minor obsession. What else is new?

Again and again, I just have to let go and trust that I am learning something, and it's getting better all the time.

I worked two days, now I am having a client meeting in an hour- must finish cleaning the house and take a shower! Feeling nervous about money, rent, time, making it work.... trying to let that go too.

It will be okay.

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